Write the story of your life in five minutes. That’s not a typo. Five minutes.
Born in NYC in the late 70s. Moved to Minnesota. Four more siblings came after me. Dad one of ten kids, so spent summers with my huge, extended family. Moved to Connecticut. Changed schools a lot. Parents got divorced.
Mom got remarried and we all moved to Minnesota again. Changed schools a lot. Crazy step-dad. Lots of partying in high school. Summers with dad in Rhode Island. Moved in with dad in Rhode Island. Back to Minnesota. Went to college. Addicted to heroin. Rehab. Recovery. Moved to L.A. Bounced around and ended up back in Rhode Island. Got married and divorced. Started phetasy.com and went bankrupt all by age 27. Moved to L.A. Became a writer, stand-up comedian, accidental pundit. Started my company again. Got sober. Met husband. Had baby. Here we are. That was fun.